The Problem(s) With Facebook (and other social media platforms)

Where we want to be cautious . . . is when the sound of a voice or a cup of coffee with a friend is replaced with ‘likes’ on a post.
— Cal Newport

Problem #1

Liking a friends picture and commenting a monkey emoji is not a form of actual communication.

The biggest issue with Social Media may not be the addictive nature — which is still a huge problem — but rather, the fact that we think sitting at home on the couch and ‘thumbing’ our way through Facebook, liking pictures, is a form of actual communication.

It’s not.

I’m the first to admit my guilt.

The physical time you spend with someone is far more valuable than connectivity time over the phone. Proximity is power.

Nothing will beat human connection.

Problem #2

Sharing the worlds problems on your Facebook wall doesn’t help the world.

All this does is annoy the living shit out of your friends list. You may argue, oh but it creates awareness and therefore this and that and thats why I do it.

More than likely, you’re bored and want attention and sharing negativity and environmental problems is your way of achieving that.

I’m not saying don’t share things that are close to your heart. Those you should absolutely share and flaunt.

But, actually going and physically doing something about those problems is what makes a difference.

The solution(s)

Solution 1

As silly as it sounds, your likes and comments should be from the heart. There is no wonder that shit is shaped like a heart. It should mean something.

You are not being a dick for not liking something. In fact, you are actually making yourself worthy. So, when you do comment on someones post or like it or follow someone — it’s fucking real. You really value that social interaction (and so does the other).

Solution 2

Try something I’ve been doing called Intermittent Social-media-ing. Just like Intermittent Fasting gives you freedom of fat loss, satiety and potential cancer-busting effects — I reckon this will, too.

The idea is to not look at social media first thing in the morning. Think of yourself as a gazelle out in the open plains of Kenya — you are vulnerable AF to negativity and family members commenting inappropriate stuff on your pictures.

It goes beyond social media. When you are in the habit of waking up and looking at email, text messages and whatever, you are priming your brain to be in a reactive state. It’s not an ideal way to begin your lovely day.

Social Media should never replace actual, real-life, social interactions. It should be a vehicle for finding cool events and keeping up to date with close family and friends.

I know I probably sound like some long-lost ancient prophet trying to reign some wisdom on you, but social media actually scares the living shit out of me. Like, where are we heading? For starters, I will tell you we are heading for a place where our heads have no necks because we will be too busy looking down at our smartphones.

Secondly, we are heading for a world where the greatest predictor of depression and loneliness will be derived from how active you are on social media.

Just because I’m writing this does not mean I have this under control. I still fuck up on a regular basis. But, just being aware has paid dividends.

Get out and go for coffee. Put the phone away. Be present with the person you’re with — there is no better feeling.

If you haven’t please subscribe to my mailing list to receive updates on the blog. Have a wonderful day.